Why Heartfelt Decisions are Optimal and How to Trust Them
Betsy Muller, MBA, Founder & CEO of The Indigo Connection LLC and www.CreateandConnectBrilliantly.com
Those of you who have attended my women’s retreats know I confess to a process of selecting co-presenters by holding each of the dozens of proposals to my heart with eyes closed. Yes, I do read the proposals, however the final decision rests with the energy I feel from this process. The scariest thing about this process is that it runs against my rational nature. I do it anyway, and it works magically!
Recently I taught a class allowing participants to experiment with the heart-sensing approach for their own decisions. The group loved learning and testing the process on real decisions they faced for their businesses and personal lives. You can try it too! Keep in mind that it works best when you are relaxed physically and without distraction. You will need a few blank 3x5 cards for this exercise.
Here are the key steps:
Make a list of your decision statements in a way that each has only a YES or NO answer. Add an obvious STRONG YES and STRONG NO statement to the mix too. An example of an obvious YES question might be “It is good for my productivity to maintain optimal health.” An obvious NO statement might be “Having hot flashes all day long is good for my business.”
Write one decision statement on each 3x5 card.
Calibrate your heart response by first testing the obvious STRONG YES and STRONG NO statements with eyes closed, holding the card with the writing side touching your heart. Notice what you feel. Alternate the YES and the NO card. Don't be surprised if the NO feels like nothing. Be more curious about what a YES feels like. For me, YES is a feeling of lift that is subtle and pleasant.
When you know what YES feels like, shuffle the rest of the cards and begin testing the other statements the same way. Don't look until you have repeated the process a few times.
Tally up the answers without looking at the questions. Have you been consistent? Did you remain calm and relaxed throughout the process? Have any patterns emerged?
Make your decisions and pay attention.
If the heart-based decision process still makes you uncomfortable, consider experimenting with it for minor decisions initially (such as choosing your lunch entreé). Recognize that decisions also need data and information, so it is optimal to gather all of that before you go to your heart for a final answer.
Soon you will be able to trust those heart feelings in a new and reliable way. Instead of wasting time stewing about a decision, you’ll quickly decide, launch into action and have more energy for the rest of your life.